Dear Single Ladies
30 THINGS YOU MUST KNOW BEFORE ACCEPTING TO MARRY A PASTOR
Every lady has a dream of getting married someday to her prince charming who will fit into her expectations and who she will live happily ever after with but before you go ahead into that marriage if your prince charming is a pastor you really need to get yourself to the under listed points. Happy reading.
(1 ) GET TO KNOW HIS AREA OF CALLING:
You need to ask questions from him which aspect of the ministry he is called into, is it deliverance, faith, healing etc .
Where is he supposed to function in the body of Christ. You need to understand his calling very well and get prepared for the task ahead.
(2 ) GOD IS HIS EMPLOYER NOT THE CHURCH:
Do not expect that because he is in charge of a large congregation then you will not have financial challenges, many have the notion that Pastors have free access to Church money and always get disappointed after marrying him. Note that the Pastor is not the sole signatory to Church account, the church is not an ATM.
You had better prepared to spend your personal money on God’s work. If your reason for wanting to marry that Pastor is money induced, please, cancel your wedding.
(3 ) PREPARE FOR A CHANGE
When you get married to a pastor, it will obstruct your plans, change your directions and divert your focus..
Dear, there are values that you will have to uphold, actions you will not be able to take, sacrifices you will have to make, your life directions will be significantly affected. How flexible are you?
(4 ) PARTNER IN SERVICE
1 Peter 4: 10, John 13: 13-17, Please, know that you are his partner in service to bless and meet people’s needs in the Name of Jesus, you are to serve alongside him, do not go with the mindset that people are to serve you. You must embrace his ministry, learn under him and give him the total support.
(5 ) LADIES PASTOR
He will not only be the pastor of men but of ladies too and some of them will be extremely attractive. So, if you are a jealous type, you had better marry someone else and quit your relationship with the Pastor.
(6 ) BIG HEART
It is not only a big hat that makes a pastor’s wife but a big heart growing in the Lord and towards the Lord Jesus. You must have a large heart to accommodate and manage different classes of people with varying characters.
(7 ) NO DEPENDENCY ON PEOPLE FOR AFFIRMATION
Before you marry a pastor you must erase your dependency on people for affirmation and increase your dependency on God for approval.
(8 ) RIGHT SPIRIT
A positive and caring spirit to serve others will be helpful, you must do away with self-centeredness and solo life because a pastor is a man of the people.
(9 ) SLEEPING ALONE
The demand of the ministry might require him to travel for ministerial assignments, meetings, and retreats which may take him away from you at night.
(10 ) OPPOSE EXTRAVAGANT LIFESTYLE
If you must marry a Pastor, you must do away with extravagance lifestyle and be humane. You must not be materialistic lest the church members detest you
(11 ) ACT OF HOSPITALITY
Before you marry a pastor, how hospitable are you? A lot of People will come for counseling in your house and most of them may not be financially strong but you must be hospitable towards them even if they don’t appreciate what you are doing.
(12 ) PREPARE TO BE A GLOBETROTTER
The work of a pastor involves a lot of transfer from city to city and nation to nation. At times, he may not spend up to three months in a location before he gets another letter of transfer. If you don’t like moving from one place to another, quit your relationship with the pastor now
(13 ) HE HAS A BOSS
He has a Boss –GOD. Do not expect him to put you ahead of his Boss. Help him to serve and obey God in all things. Please, don’t push him against God.
(14 ) MAN OF GOD
Before you marry a pastor, please always remember that he is a man. So, do not assume that been a man of God he does not have sexual urge and temptations like other men, he does. Maintaining your good looks and shape and helping his sexual needs is very important for you to be able to keep him from falling into temptations.
(15 ) GOD’S REPRESENTATIVE
Before you marry that pastor, know that he is not just a man but God’s mouthpiece and His representative and you must respect and treat him as such, will you be able to?
(16) NO EVERYDAY ROMANCE
Marrying a pastor come with its own challenges and one of it is that pastor will pray at night. So, sorry no everyday romance in a Pastor’s diary.
(17) IT IS A 24/7 JOB:
A pastor’s job is a 24 hours of the seven days in the week, it fit the slogan FULL TIME. There may not be time to go out to your favourite restaurant in a long time because of the round the clock attention demand from his church members. Can you cope with this?
(18) NOT AN OIL WORKER:
Before you marry that pastor, please wake up to the fact that he is not an oil and gas staff. So, conflict: money may not flow like you think. Although, God’s staff are the best paid in the world over but will you be able to wait faithfully for Him to pay? His timing is totally different.
(19) CHURCH CONFLICT:
Mama in the waiting, there will be conflict. Yes, even in the church, people disagree and sometimes flesh might be displayed in a dirty manner. They may form a caucus and gang up against the pastor. Are you matured enough to handle it?
(20) THE PERFECT WIFE:
You will be expected to behave perfectly, other women have the right to get angry and show it but not YOU, even your Prince charming expectation will be higher as he expect you not to demonstrate your displeasure no matter the circumstances. Are you prepared for this?
(21) MUMMY MISSION:
Before you marry that pastor, hope you do not have anything against living in the mission house especially if he is a pastor in a denomination where their Pastor must live in the mission house. Please, be informed that the mission house is everybody’s house as the Church members can walk in at any time, deny you your privacy, eat your food, exhaust your water, mess up your toilet and you must not complain because the house is built with their money for them to have unhindered access to their Pastor.
(22) PRAY FOR ALL:
The elders, deacons, workers that hate your husband will be known to you and you still have to pray for them and with them, can you do this?
(23) FORGIVES AND FORGET:
Before you marry that pastor, please be informed that you will be expected to forgive and forget offenses fast so as not to hinder the Church and the Pastor’s prayer. You must have forgiveness in wholesale because, members, ministers, deacons, good women, men, girl the youths and elders will offend you and you must forgive the if you want your husband to excel in his calling.
(24) PERFECT PARENTING:
Your children are not expected to make mistake, display tantrums, be too playful, they are expected to be mini Angels. God help you, girl if they are not.
(25) ALL PROGRAMS :
Before you marry a pastor please note that you will be forced to attend all Church programs, no excuse of any kind. If not , the Church will be having negative impression about you.
As the pastor Mrs, you will fast and this is not a suggestion but a compulsory thing as it comes with your wedding package.
(27) PRAYER MACHINE:
Before you marry the pastor, be inform that you will pray when you feel like praying and when you don’t feel like prayer. Prayer must become your hobby. As you become Pastor Mrs, you must know how to PUSH. That is praying until something happens and in the Ministry, we will never stop praying until Jesus come.
(28) LEAD WOMEN:
Your good women leader might be as old as your mum, some will try to make you realize that they are older and want to intimidate you, will you be able to handle them with wisdom?
(29) MEETING, SEMINARS etc:
Before you decide to marry that pastor, girl note that he will be required to attend many meetings, seminars, and plan, organise revivals, crusades, meetings , seminars, etc You might be required to organise seminars for women, youths and pregnant mothers which may be quite big, do you have that capacity? he will attend some alone will you be fine?
(30) DEMONIC ATTACK:
Attacks are directed at the shepherd so expect it, are you equipped enough for this? Are you a spiritually vibrant sister or a weakling? Do you have that strong relationship with heaven? Matt 26:31
Written by Pastor Andrew Yarquah
Edited and published by: Clement Afreh CBCInc Hypes @clementafreh